Month: December 2005

1 down, 3 to go, 6 days left

so, in good news, first exam went like hot pancakes. totally sweet. i completely didn’t answer one question (4 marks out of 60), but i can afford to miss like 16 marks and still get 82% as final mark! i’m feeling good. my hand feels like it totally will die.

distractions: videos: don’t work so hard – totally applies, canon d on guitar – very inspiring music, and the guy looks so into it that its just sweet.

this is a wicked idea. next time i have a chance to paint a wall in my room (or two) with this paint, i’m so doing that. its paint that has metal in it, which makes your walls magnetic. *sweetest* *idea* *ever* (and no lead, totally safe).

cool website for cute semi useful stuff.

lovin’ right now

i present THE WEBSITE OF MY DREAMS: cuteoverload. pictures of cute stuff.

going to eat tonight: garlic mashed potatoes, and very awesome steak.
garlic mashed potatoes:
boil potatoes with some bayleaf and garlic until smooshy. throw away the water, and mush with minced garlic and cream and butter, to texture desired. cream makes them smooooth.

steak:
no clue yet. probably just steak with some spices – its really good meat, should taste awesome. :D

yay for all the fluffy snow outside!

deux balles de 22. vingt deux ans adieu

why do exams stress me out so much? its like the smallest thing can set me off.

in the recent years i have calmed down significantly. i used to have much more mood swings, which would go from negative to positive extremes in a very short amount of time, with negative mood prevailing.

as time moved on, so did my mood swings. in the past 3 years it has been a particularly strong wave of improvement, with moods straying towards mostly positive.

last 2 years, i am happy.

but exams – only exams, no other kind of stress, not work, not people stress, not photoshoots-gone-wrong, no fights, no broken cameras, laptops, no missed flights-lost-luggage, no other situation except exams – bring back these terrible moodswings where i can barely get a handle on myself. it feels like if i don’t do well, everything will end. and i know – i know – that it is not true. at this point marks matter so little. i’ll be fine even if i have to take this stupid databases course 5 times.

and still, right now, if i’m not studying or keeping myself busy with something (talking, cleaning), i just start freaking out.

and i’m in 4th year and i still can’t get a handle on this.

playlist:

  • Mc solaar – La belle et le bad boy
  • Conjure One – Sleep
  • Sean Paul – We be Burnin
  • Max Richter – November
  • Moby – Raining Again
  • tchaikovsky – swan lake
  • bt – remember (sasha’s mix)
  • Sarah Brightman – Deliver me

    • and that’s all really.

    marks – databases

    blah, this sucks

    this google search shows the marks i’ve gotten, assuming an 80% for the 3rd assignment. the last value – the 0.35 * 70 is the value of the final.

    essentially, that means my databases mark will suck. no matter what i do.

    :(

    update
    my lovely, awesome boyfriend (did i mention how great he is?) shown that i can’t do math (thankfully!)
    i forgot to multiple my midterm mark by a 100 meaning i was missing out on a big chunk.
    the new math

    unless i autofail (get <40%) i actually will get above 60.

    you know, its funny. i was so depressed about this. and i figured that there is no way – no way! – to make me feel better about this. and he just went and did. instance … ah okay i’ll spare you all the lovey dovey stuff and go tell it to him.

    coffee

    coffee cup

    one day i’ll have a machine that will allow me to make tasty coffee drinks like that.

    //back to studying philosophy… in which i will get *80%* if i pull of a 75% on the exam!

    update @ 12:01am
    that’s it! i can’t do it anymore. the names are starting to mix up in my head. i guess i’ve been studying (with some breaks here and there but mostly studying) since 2pm. wow!
    who i have read (book), revised (class notes), reedited (together with overheads) and thus reviewed:
    Nagel, Goldman (I, VIII), Kant, Stein (II, V),
    who i have done at most 2/3 of the above (and thus not totally reviewed yet):
    Singer – done the second half of Kant’s critique, but totally didn’t get first half. e-mailed prof.
    Mendus – reviewed but don’t feel confident – keep forgetting what she wrote about (all jokes aside, marriage faithfulness. but she’s arguing AGAINST it)
    Hajdin (2) – nothing done except rereading class notes. no lecture notes, so i have to reread the whole thing
    Rapaport (I, III, IV) – done all 3 but its all a huge mess in my head and on the paper so still have to totally do

    that’s for the short answer part.

    for the essay part i have 4 people:
    Elliston – “Gay Marriage” (4-5)
    Jordan (both arguments) – “Is it Wrong to Discriminate on the Basis of Homosexuality?”
    Nussbaum (everything except section II) – “Objectification,” Specific examples from D.H. Lawrence and Playboy, seven ways of treating as an object, discussions of D.H. Lawrence and Playboy.
    Primoratz (4-5) – “What’s Wrong with Prostitution?” – first and second feminist critiques

    i’ve got a superficial overview of all of them, but for the essay part i need to be cracking these guys off in depth. i’ll probably sketch something out for nussbaum, as her paper is HUGE, one merged gay marriage argument(almost wrote gay prostitution – now THATS a philosophy paper topic), and definitely primoratz as he could appear in both short answer AND essay part.

    anyway. time for a break..nnnnow.

    update @ 12:22
    fun links:
    cute illustration of the website development proccess

    an interesting japanese magician

    pixel fonts

    Time goes by so slowly

    wow, madonna’s latest song somehow makes me feel good.
    hung up

    things that make me happy today:

    1. my loving, awesome boyfriend
    2. my loving, awesome boyfriend that withstands me talking on the phone to random people in russian a gazillion times at 10am after falling aslepe at 5am
    3. my loving, awesome boyfriend that let me steal his awesome red bag that makes me so happy
    4. my white jacket that is keeping me warm and cozy
    5. my headphones that still work despite tearing apart to the wire in 2 places (2!)
    6. hot dogs
    7. chai latte
    8. u of t laidlaw walk
    9. bahen ceilings
    10. studying in u of t
    11. last day of classes!
    12. having awesome profs (like the one who taught philosophy and was talking to me and a classmate for 20 minutes after the end of last tutorial and class!)
    13. people who i used to know who i randomly meet in subway who invite out to a beer
    14. my cousins who are cutest bunch ever
    15. my friends who bug me lovingly when i disappear off the face of the earth
    16. my parents
    17. (what else do i need to say, they’re my parents)
    18. my laptop, which is my trusty friend through thick and thin
    19. listening to christmas music through above headphones and feeling overjoyed at it being crispy outside
    20. dooce.com’s rants from 3 years ago
    21. every little thing that you say or do
    22. looking forward to all the awesome things that will hit me as exams will start ending
    23. the fact i’m not at all scared of exams
    24. the fact that one of my previous jobs asked me to come back for a project
    25. getting gifts for those whom i love that i’ll give for xmas
    26. the beauty in this world
    27. hart house coffee
    28. my dog’s brown eyes
    29. music
    30. watching csi downloaded on my desktop while i was out of the home through the wireless network at my house. how cool does technology GET! home networks never worked well for me, but this time, thanks to tim’s efforts, its all working.
    31. everything is working.
    32. my loving, awesome boyfriend.
    33. life.