date: 1079465900

mood: grrrrr
listening to:dune – rainbow to the stars

i was making scrambled eggs.
i put a little bow into the microwave to warm it up
on take it out after 15 seconds i proceeded to accidentally smash the bowl so hard against the edge of the microwave plate that it shattered into my scrambled eggs which were made with the last drops of milk we had.
no scrambled eggs, and no time to have a nice shower and breakfast as i needed to clean up everything. the glass shards are tiny and they are EVERYWHERE. its insane. i vacuumeed every tile with the narrowest nozzle. i wiped everything three times. i’m still paranoid. and the fucking plate is broken.

*sighs* while cleaning up i noticed how pretty much every action i do is so clumsy. i smash into stuff, i bump into stuff, i don’t stop my hand fast enough from getting something and i get another bruise. seriously, i’m 20. why the heck am i so clumsy?

i have an honest jealousy for people who can take things and look graceful like doing it.

maybe that’s why i can’t dance. i don’t have good control over my body movememnts, be those controlled or not.

i’m annoyed, pissed off and running out of time because i’m clumsy. this is not fair!

date: 1077637989

mood: frustrated
listening to:hits 1035

easily.

just fail a midterm! and get 69% on the other one.

i got 19/20 on programming assignment.

you know, as much as it pisses me off, and upsets me, i’m still not worried. maybe i’lld rop, maybe i’ll just barely pass – of course i can wave bye bye to my wished 3.0 gpa.

but … well, blah.

my happy things for today: pretty cuba pictures. soft bed. friendly dog. i’ll dress pretty and feel pretty. i’ll meet friends. i ate a tasty breakfast. sunny outside.

date: 1074366686

mood:
listening to:blur – song 2

it wasn’t easy
but nothing is

whoooohoooo

erm, hi
yeah that’s me being hyper. im eating great food, and im studying stuff and weee. the only bad part about this week is that i didn’t get to see hesi, or any other people outside of university. booo.

“its not my problem, its not my prooobleeeeem wooohooo when i feel heavy metal”

uhmmm yeaaah no skiing today boo
gotta study and gotta clean

http://www.cs.toronto.edu/~fich/240/
http://www.cdf.utoro…cises/e02/index.html

i wonder if any of my profs going to use the “links to” feature of google. i’d so do it if i was a prof.

if you are one of my CS profs and you’re reading this page, i’d just like to say while 240 looks hard and 207 looks work intensive i am very happy to be taking both of them! w00t for girls in CS!

i think i’ll go do my homework before i’m any more crazy.

date: 1072825206

mood: pissed off
listening to:

i never realized how competitive i am until i started taking more than two classes with the same person, and playing chess with a friend.

every single mark that i get lower literally makes my heart hurt
every single game i lose makes me feel like an idiot

i take every. single. thing. SO personally.

i was having a great day, a great BIRTHDAY until i went and started playing kungfu chess http://arcade.icq.com/game_multi_chess.htm

really, i should learn. i can’t be a gracious winner, i can’t be a calm loser, i take everything very personally. what sucks even more that i have 4 classes with the same person next semester.

and i am going to die, every.single.time. we’ll get assignments back.

i hate it. i really really hate it. i just can’t take anything relaxed-ly. and there is no way out of it! because that person just keeps wanting to play chess with me!

and the worst thing that if i win it makes no difference whatsoever. i feel guilty for winning and i feel like they let me win.

FUCK. i want my birthday to be better than this.

date: 1117739312

mood: i feel pretty, oh so pretty, so witty and pretty and gay!
listening to:california dreaming (2004 remix)

among the vastness of work, tedium, pressure, deadlines, responsibilities, failure and more hard work, there is a heaven. and it is called “stuff that makes you happy”. and within that realm of stuff, there are many things which could be included – or excluded, depends on who you are.

me for example, i dislike shopping. i love the result of a properly completed shopping course, however the process is a pain from every aspect. the choosing, the lines, the trying on, the prices, the choosing…

however, the result of such “hard” “work” is STUFF. stuff like tasty food, or pretty clothes, or (well, here shopping is mostly a pleasant process, its the paying that sucks) new lenses or new cameras, new computers, new books, new photographs, or as such is this case, a shiny new bag

indeed my friends. it is the age of brightness, blueness, and my newly acquired ability to purchase a new bag on the paycheck that i’ve gotten this week. my first paycheck too!

the crappy photograph on the left (not mine, googled) vaguely demonstrates the excellent qualities of my new purchase. first of all, it is bright blueish green (in my biased colorblind opinion. some might say just blue, and since these some are nine west designers i shall call it the BLUE BAG). this particular hue is almost quite and not entirely identical to my new shoes which were purchased some previous time ago. but this isn’t where the joys of this beauty end.

oh, no.

it has transparent pockets. how cool is that? one, with a zipper, and on the other side, 2 smaller ones, with no zippers. mmm, useful. and the trim (there’s a trim!) is a pseudo leather, colored tan. quite the stylish combination, even if i do say so. outside of style, this beauty has function. first, it has a very nifty magnetic lock on the top. second, the bottom is hard-lined, making it safer for various fragile objects.

“but, olya, what fragile objects could you carry?” you would question. this is where the Function part comes! my laptop fits into this bag perfectly. not only that, there are 3 smaller bags, 2 with mirrors and one for a cellphone that come with this bag. “GET TOTALLY ORGANIZED” says nine west, and i obey, for my life shall be extremely organized with this bag.

in other small joys, it sits pleasantly in my hand, its large enough without being bulky, and it will fit things other than my laptop neatly. and the small purses look like they will become useful on certain occasions. and there are smaller pockets inside as well.
and, here is the bestest part.
i just managed to waste 5 minutes of your life with a descrption of a bag. in words of the ikea man, “is because you are crazy.”

:P

date: 1112579093

mood: good. tired. hungry.
listening to:manual & syntaks – sal paradise

“In Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder and bloodshed but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance. In Switzerland, they had brotherly love; they had five hundred years of democracy and peace and what did they produce? The cuckoo clock.” — Orson Welles (1915–1985).

today, i went to sleep at 7am, new time, and still today, i woke up at 2pm, new time.

it is so easy to mess up your schedule and is so far much harder to arrange it back again! so i’m feeling … not hungover, for i didn’t drink last night, but something along those lines. tired. lack of sleep, and lack of normal schedule, lack of normal food schedule. not that i am complaining, mind you, more like bragging ;p i’d totally go out again tonight if i could. all i have left is *1* assignment …

and 4 exams … shudder.

went over to my cousin’s today, got a pair of jeans which are AWESOME. a whole lotta other stuff, new pants, new sweaters, cute things. but the jeans are just yay.

this song is yay too. sal paradise.

date: 1109174387

mood: nervous (midterm in linguistics), happy.
listening to:madonna – ray of light

and sometimes things just keep getting better.

i have no time or stuff to write except weeeeeee. yooouuu knooooow what i’m talking about.

date: 1105821270

mood:
listening to:

http://www.cia.gov/n…globaltrend2020.html

before i forget

date: 1099661713

mood:
listening to:

friday morning. waking up at 7:30… why? against all reasonable impulses and sanity i decided not to go out last night. i’m still not sure why – any reasonable person would have, as most of my floor has shown. but being the nutso that i am, i went to bed at 1am. and woke up at 7:30.

which gave me plenty of time to shower, and make oladushki, eat them, drink milk on the side, enjoy morning tv (enjoy uses for various values of it). meet simon, who was going ot the fish market to get fresh fish. why fresh fish, you ask? i mean, we are losers, we don’t even have freezers in our friges.

well… a few weeks ago, he lost me on a bet about pratchett’s books. the bet was on a dinner. seeing as simon knows how to make SUSHI, tonight he is making for myself, possibly chris and for others to try. woohoo!

read a bit of my stupid art.

art.

ah yes.

so okay, the class that we have here are based around all of us reading a “task”, which brings questions and ideas to our minds, and thus challenges us to discuss it. after discussing the “task”, we form questions. go home, read the assigned reading, answer questions, and discuss the answers in class.

… in theory anyway …

so first of all, all the freaking tasks for this class are QUOTES. BIG quotes. which are undigestable unless you know what you are talking about, in which case its counter intuitive as you’re not supposed to know what you are talking about!!

second of all, we had almost 100 page (95) of reading assigned on wed. afternoon for friday morning.

how many people did the reading?

well, if we sum up all the reading done in the class, i think we read maybe 40 pages total. that’s including overlaps. yeaah….

so the discussion was great.

this class BETTER improve.

due for next class: 140 pages of reading. at least the next class is on wednesday… and i don’t really plan to cover it all. i’ll read what is intersting. most of it is, thankfully.

anyway… i typed a huge entry and lost it, and my paste turned out to have gotten overwritten with something else. argh. so the above is what i had before, kinda, reworded.

anyway, after class… i typed the entry, twice, downloaded all the articles (as internet seemes to not work anymore. packets can be sent but not received. blah). and now i shall head home with a stop at hairdressers to see if i can afford some moral boosters.

received and replied to emails from parents. my mom got me a bunch of stuff (in india), yayness. can’t wait to see her photos!!

aand to finish off

have a great weekend everyone!

date: 1095776190

mood: tired, headachy
listening to:faithless – drifting away (paradiso mix) (it is GOOD, scarf, get it, damnit)

okay, people.
amsterdam was fun.

but you will hate me. i can’t tell you about it.

well, not now.

since i done nothing productive over the weekend, all of monday and tuesday was spent being productive. i even did laundry! and studied (chinese, a lot, its FUN, i have more quotes from the prof), and bought food (i was all out). basically, i made sure i dont end up sitting in a corner, starving and insane.

today, i have an 8am-8pm type of day. woke up at 8, did reading for the class at 11, came to class (walked, bike broken, long story, will post), had a very boring lecture, then 30 mins break, then a 2 hour tutorial, now i barely had a 30 min break and i gotta take the bus to the other side of the river where my french course starts.

and AGH i have so much to tell but i literally had no time to do it! and i get home at 8 (if i dont come online, which i shouldn’t), and then i have class at 11 tomorrow as well, and i have to do the reading for THAT too… therefore next large update should come at 1pm my time == 7am your time, tomorrow.

blah, headache.

francesca left to rome until saturday. shame her bike is broken too, otherwise i could’ve taken it. her breakage is unrelated to mine.

uuhmm… that’s all. sowwy guys.

next update will be pretty, with pictures and stuffs. i prooomise.

i have 2 days off in the middle of the week in 2 weeks from now, wed and thursday. any ideas where i should go?