Category: funny
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happy valley goose bay
my first day in goose bay was full of adventure.
goose bay, actually called happy valley goose bay is a city in Labrador. it has the largest runway in north america, was an important site for fuel refueling in WW2 and is a secondary NASA landing site. current population is around 7,000 people. i’m here because of business, and due to the flight scheduling i had to arrive on sunday, giving me a full day of exploring.
flight left toronto at 7am, meaning i left home at 5:30am, meaning i woke up at 4 and got up at 4:30am. painful. the flight and the transfer on halifax were pretty uneventful, however. (one exception to that is something that i’ve noticed: small airports in canada are way more strict about security – in toronto i didn’t beep going through the metal scanner – and in halifax i did. now, the only 3 items of metal on me are my watch, my wedding ring, and 4 tiny studs in my shoes. same for the amount of scrutiny for the scanning of the luggage. line moved efficiently, but still twice as slow as pearson.)
adventure started in the airport. i walk up to the National rental counter, say my name, that i’m with (the large company i work for) and that i have a car reserved. she pulls out the reservation, and 5 minutes into filling it out turns out that i’m … too young to get it. i’m 24, and i need to be 25. now, i’ve taken trips to sudbury and thompson (manitoba) already, and rented national in both places. the girl at the check in counter in sudbury recognizes me. i haven’t had any issues, except here.
after i feel my face going red, i realize i have nothing to be worried about, and start laughing at the absurdity of the situation. i suggest she calls her manager, and if that doesn’t work out i’ll call our travel agency and have them sort it out. thankfully, 20 minutes later it turns out that [my company] is one of the 4 others in canada that has the special deal of letting underage drivers rent cars. and the woman didn’t know it because they don’t have internet in the airport yet.
after getting my car and directions around the city, i get my brief lunch (caribou burger! tasty, but nothing too different), and take a break outside with my book before going out to explore the surroundings (which are gorgeous!). i unlock the car, toss my bag in, check that the door opens and lean against it to start reading my book. 30 seconds later i hear a *click*.
the car just locked.
and the keys are inside.
the same lady who dealt with me in the airport drives up, unlocks the car without getting out of hers, we exchange a couple of friendly jokes (everyone are total sweethearts around here), and i go off on my merry way of exploring. photos later – but salient point is that after those 2 events i almost got stuck in a sand dune. that would’ve been charming…
its almost 6pm now, and i have to wake up at 5am – class is at 7am. i’m not even sure if i should go get dinner!
photos taken, pratchett book finished, i am not sure what to do next. however, good day in happy valley goose bay!
google trends
coincidence? i think not. (similar.)
love is paradise
there is this song that i heard a long time ago, made by “first base” and called “love is paradise”. the next line? “cause love multiplies”. seriously, they couldn’t find a better rhyme?
what’s sadder is that it took me at least 7 years to realize the stupidity of that line! i guess the beat is pretty good.
by margot
WOMAN’S LOVE POEM
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who’s not a creep,
One who’s handsome, smart and strong
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who’ll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he’s gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won’t be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who’ll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to “how big is my behind?â€
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.
MAN’S LOVE POEM
I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with
huge boobs who owns a bar on a golf course,
and loves to send me fishing and hunting. This
doesn’t rhyme and I don’t give a shit.