date: 1079747245
mood: not happy
listening to:the white stripes – seven nation army
i went shopping today.
and now i shall eat tasty stuff.
you be good.
Category: general life updates
didn’t expect this
date: 1078099008
mood: concentrated, like orange juice
listening to:hits 1035
My life is rated NC-17.
What is your life rated?
i’m working on python/regular expression assignment. need help. pleaassee?
recursion
date: 1074494856
mood: mentally exhausted, physically agitated
listening to:enigma – mea culpa, nin – *
-> the glasses i found that i liked. didn’t buy, not yet. must compare more. blah.
-> visited a fish shop, another one, so now i know where the best bettas are. going to get them soon.
-> thought more about marks. felt stupid. felt more stupid. felt even more stupid and finally accepted and stopped being upset.
-> came home and did some questions to help parent’s friends master’s level statistics… no, wait. statistics course. felt smart. didn’t clean cause was doing that. was too tired to do anything more smart after that.
-> realized how fucking stupid it is that i can do stuff after i fuck up on the course.
ouch
heart
hurts
need to make
doctor appointment.
i hate it. it hurts more lately. or like i feel … i feel that its beating so hard that i can’t do anything else. that i need to stop and lean or i feel im going to have a heart attack. i hate it. im 20. i dont want to get tired after walking up 2 flights of stairs in the subway. i need to plan for more time to geteverywhere cause i can’t walk fast enough. fuck.
-> finished assignment. wrote 3/5 neatly. understood a hard question. i can’t decide whether im so stupid i dont see things i dont understand or im just confused periodically.
and let me guess, everyone are going to say that “nooo, you’re smart” :|
its weird. it doesn’t matter what you say. its what i feel. for 3 years my mom told me i look great with glasses. friends, relatives, told me that. and yet only when i randomly looked in the morning sleepy stare mirror and liked what i seen that could remove the complex.
and not even then fully. i was doing that uncomfortable smile thing today when i was trying on glasses.
aah fuck.
heart hurts.
mea culpa.
birthday is all over…
date: 1072854191
mood: cute jumpy
listening to:groove coverage – poison [aha! found the dance mix!]
… and i still feel like its on. i woke up at … 12? 1? … i wanna have more birthday. its so short, and its only once a year, and i was upset for some of the time anyway.
my mood became so much better, so it was okay.
what i got:
and pilllows and a robe with my initials yay pretty
and of course the blue pretty thingie from scarfy
aah birthday dead so im tired so im gone mmmm
sleep well you all… there will be no more olya teenage stupidity ….
or will there? cue suspenseful music
its important to try new things
date: 1118520976
mood: sore
listening to:yahel & eyal barkhan – voyage (sunstacia remix), Zombie Nation-Whoa Oh Oh Oh
do you set goals? do you have a goal for this summer? mine is to write an excellent linguistics paper and do a great presentation, do morning runs with shady, and make a newer, better portfolio.
what are yours?
loudness
date: 1112809115
mood: bouncy!! sunny!! jeansy!! white shirts!!
listening to:computer science class, last lecture. not even going to be on the exam.
montreal, downtown, 2005
next to this wall, there were bikers. some were selling metal trinkets. it was remarkable for it was such a variety of bikes, sports, and… the other kind (you know, big leaser seats). they were loud, and it was cool. we passed by this place twice, and i took this composite (vertical) on the 2nd walk.
in other news, i found my life’s goal. before i tell you what it is, read this joke:
A tourist was admiring the necklace worn by a local Indian.
“What is it made of?” she asked.
“Alligator’s teeth,” the Indian replied.
“I suppose,” she said patronizingly, “that they mean as much to you as pearls do to us.”
“Oh no,” he objected. “Anybody can open an oyster.”
so, my goal in life is to hunt and kill a real alligator/crocodile, get its biggest tooth, and carve myself a pretty trinket for a necklace. the reason is … i don’t mind pearls. but they are not cool. alligator teeth on the other hand are cool. except, they are not that pretty. having someone else do this for me is … lame. and doing it on my own is connected to such a great amount of implications, all of which i don’t mind (travel, indepdendence, strength of character, braveness, creativity and ability to carve, sense of style in 3d).
so, there you go.
and so, february comes to a close
date: 1109564783
mood:
listening to:
its amazing. 2 months already finished. it feels like my birthday was a few days ago! but as life shows, happiness can continue throughout the flow of time with complete disregard for midterms, work, assignments, and anything else that can pop up in its way.
i am completely drooling over these purses at the moment. i have a laptop, right? and i have a bunch of really ugly ways of carrying it arround. and with some nice stuff that seems to be happening very soon i might even be able to splurge on one of these babies. i’m just not sure which one and they are all. so. good.
http://www.knomobags.com – check out the red one. i have a red jacket. its a match made in heaven!
http://acmemade.com/thedesignerslim.html – or any of the other ones at this website. colors are so pretty. PINK. aah. *dies* and it comes in 12 inch size too. which is what i’d prefer, given that i have a tiny notebook and i want a tiny bag damnit!
http://www.pinderbags.com/laptopbags.html?color=orange&size=S&quanity=1&hid=1 – also available in 12 inch size. i’m not a huge fan of the colors, but it seems to fit also the powersupply, and pda/cellphone which i also need. add a wallet and i’m set for school.
http://www.wabags.com/products/bags/details.asp?id=75 – there are also cool. the black one is neat. “Two slide outer pockets, interior organizational compartment for zip files,cds, business cards, diskettes,pens & notepads.” yum. except not avaialble in small.
http://www.standardtm.com.au/diva – smart, stylish. business. maybe too businessy for me, but definitely better than what i have now! also for larger notebooks.
http://www.kolobags.com/product.php?productid=93&cat=0&page=1 – looks nice. a bit simple, but very stylish.
from target, rip off of acme bags from this place – looks interesting.
in other interesting news:
numbers as sensations – a first person look from an autistic savant perspective. interesting and good read. ~10-15 minutes reading, depending on individual speed.
c’est tout, mes amis, just for now.
time for tiredenss
date: 1106202942
mood: hanging on to the balance
listening to:
stress of school is gettin’ to me. i want more time! but i also love it, in a perverted kind of way. asin “woohoo, i aint getting free time but i get to meet all these super smart cool people who call me at 10am and wanna do assignments with me!” and its completely worth it.
if i only i could go to sleep earlier.
from weirdo’s blog, randomly picked
1)Name the Last Four Things You Have Bought: tea x 4
2)Name Four Drinks You Regularly Drink : water, tea
5)What’s Under Your Bed? dog, dust bunnies
7)Current Hair? odd
8)Current Clothes? sweat pants. slouchy off shoulder shirt. comfy stuff.
9)Current Desktop Picture ? abstracty golden thingie
10)Current Worry? 263 (data algorithms and analysis) assignment, then psych essay, then ling assignment, then neural nets assignment.
12)Favorite Places To Be? switzerland. europe. france. paris. u of t. bed.
13)Least Favorite Place? outside
19)Favorite Day(s)? all of em
20)Where Would You Like To Go? see favorite places to be (silly, no?)
21)Where do you want to live when you get married? see favorite places to be (did this person not thing or something)
22)Favorite food? right now this second? fish. sushi!
23)Color of most clothes you own: black/white/maroon/g rey/blue
24)Number of pillows you sleep with? 2 + dog
25)What do you wear when you go to sleep?: depends on comfort mood.
26)What were you doing 12AM last night: studying
29)Have you ever had braces? yah
32)What is the brand of your wallet? roots! i know cause its the first brand i have evah.
33)First piercing/tattoo? SHUDDER, no.
35)Last person you yelled at? a friend, on the phone. first time of me yelling at anyone, for a looong time
37)Last thing you ate? rice with shrimp in garlic sauce with vegetables.
yeah, so. stuff. i’m doing good. keeping healthy. bringing lunch w/ me to school. drinking green tea. room is moderately dirty. sleep is still lacking. assignments all being worked on, to a certain degree. closet is clean. stuff is moving, all in the right direction. i hope, i think. good night, people.
the weekend of foreign visitors
date: 1100699159
mood: in pain. tired. happy. missing home.
listening to:construction workers
i am so long overdue for an update, that i feel highly guilty.
…
well, not guilty, just bad since time is flying past so, so, fast. it feels like just yesterday the november was in the single digits…
internet from my room has weakened to the point where i am not sure when i can get it anymore, which is quite a shame. however, tom and jerome got new laptops this weekend, whose wireless reception is much much better than mine. they can catch stuff, so there’s hope for me yet.
lets see… last 5 days.
last post was on thursday.
friday! morning class. i dressed nice! even though it is cold, i still wore my “french” skirt – anyway, it’s called that now because it has been deemed french by julien when he first saw it (way back in september), as well as a hong kong girl who met me after french class and thought i am french (seriously, would i be taking french?). it was nice though.
friday.. well, i remember it being fairly quiet. we went out, but just to highlander, for a few hours. not everyone went. i THINK there was a sangria party, but i also think i was tired that evening so i stayed in my room reading before going out. anyway, friday is inconsequential (although going to highlander is becoming more and more fun, its really like our own place).
saturday is the day i really want to remember! saturday morning was boring, with me waking up far too late, again. the whole day was wildly unproductive, with nearly nothing getting done in any of my courses. i think i cleaned up my room, which is nice – i enjoy being there now, it is cozy and cute, and feels like my own. later in the evening, julien’s three friends from paris came over – well, they were over for the whole weekend, however they spent the time before travelling.
the three guys, whose names i was obviously unable to remember after seeing most of them for the first time in my life (one of them we met in paris, when we went there), lets call ’em paris guy (the one we met, curly haired, has a girlfriend), short haired (tall, shorthaired, very french), and guitarist (curly hair, plays the guitar, is in engineering!). all three of them very nice, friendly, considering they lived on our floor for 3 days, its nice. friday they went out independently with julien.
so, yes, saturday. ate dinner, took shower, successfully missed going out to play pool, but no big loss. went out around 12 to highlander with chris, simon, myself and patricia. there we met sandra and noyla (who went to cologne that day, due to a supposed parade happening there, however as it turned out there was no parade, it was cold, and they were very tired. they tried to persuade other people to go but i successfully resisted their charms! i think for the best; but i do want to go there before i leave europe), julien + 3 friends, francesca, nicolas and aphrodita, and jerome. conspiciously absent: thomas (paris, vising parents), david (out with his friends from eindohven – he came back right as we left, but he was dead tired and didn’t want to go), aaaand that’s all. so, LOTS of people.
ah, yes. fast forward 2 fantastic hours later, a few beers, an AWESOME conversation with kris (that’s how you spell his name! kristian. i keep forgetting!) about russian culture (about guy/girl relationships in russia, sexual “harassment”, general attitudes between the sexes, and general social behavior among those who lived there and live there), and then i grilled him about norwegian society and culture (so. interesting. honestly, its aewsome fun to ask people about their countries and all. with the right questions you can get some awesome information! and personal too!), we finally packed up and went to meta – everyone except jerome who only listens to reggae.
this saturday night was seriously one of the greatest times i went out. i mean, the first time i really danced was great also, but this time it was the same only with more people! everyone were dancing, every single person, and we stayed out until 5:30 am. highlight of the evening: dancing to “i will survive” with this remix version, which had a chorus going in the end “naaana na na na na na, na na na naa na na na na na na” in this melody … erm, yeah, text is superb for transferring the melody names. so to this kinda russian chorus sounding melody we formed a looong cancan like line and we all were throwing our legs up in the air. so a chain of like 10 people, after 2 hours of dancing and 2 hours of bar hopping (we also stopped by the … place that’s decorated with faeries, has neat lighting, and a lot of gaming machines, can’t remember the name). hehehe, it was fantastic. just awesome.
anyway, so we arrived home at 5:30 – that would be me and chris. everyone else – 8 people! – fit into julien’s car and went that way. sandra took my bike (tom’s bike while he’s gone, actually), so i guess we were 11 people total.
upon arrival home, we stayed up until 8:30 (8:30! saw the sunrise! argh, pics are at home). i showed my photographs, people were impressed. it brings such joy to me! the guitarist was in shock “what are you doing studying computer science, do photography!”. he says he works with designers/art designers, and my stuff is better than theirs. w00tw00t. gives me nothing but pride, but that’s also good.
so, yeah. we were drinking french absenth with tea (made on top of the electic plate in a pot, our kettle is broken for like 2 weeks now). francesca made risotto, and they ate at 7 am. nuts!
at 8:30 i went to sleep. woke up at 12:30, woke up chris (who REALLY didn’t feel like getting up, but we arranged the night before to force eachother to wake up), went to the library around 2-3. library: studied chinese, in the sense that i translated a chinese text that i had to. like 6 sentences took me 1.5 hours! aaay! *sigh* i apparently need cantonese and not mandarin in order to speak chinese in downtown toronto, so its completely useless anyway. at least the characters will hopefully come in use!
after library, came home, had a shower, dinner, finished chinese, did some programming. pretty uneventful day.
monday: woke up too late, programmed some, went to chinese.
tuesday: woke up too early, met professor, had a great meeting with him, came home, went shopping for food with tom (yay for aldi + car). came home, prepared for french.
borrowed tom’s bike to go to french.
this is where my luck failed me.
after about 5 minutes on the bike, before even reaching the first interesection (however leaving the parking lot), something happened, the back wheel of the bike locked, and i flew on the ground.
first thought: “i don’t have my laptop with me. PHEW”
next thought: “OW”
big big shock. i fell hard. on my legs, arms, and worst of all, my back, which still hurts. i don’t think its serious, just probably a bruise. but its NOT nice.
what happened is that somehow the brake cable got tangled around the backwheel and thus locked it after spinning around it.
i limped home, kinda carrying the bike. obviously didn’t go to french, which sucks, cause this would make it a 3rd miss and thus i’ll either fail or have to do an extra assignment. i think she will understand though…
anyway. so last night i was in bed for the whole evening, no moving, everything hurts, a complete shock for the first hour.
today, morning, wednesday, 8:30 class, walked to school (ouch). almost fell asleep too many times during lecture. tutorial was okay.
it sucks; lectures are interesting but are toooo damn early.
anyway… typed this long entry to keep up to date.
coming home, helping tom with his paper, helping julien with his paper, helping noyla with her papers (she speaks english very poorly. i’m the only one not getting annoyed, so i help her out a lot. well, i think same goes for chris.). reading my readers for tomorrow’s art group meeting (blah, presentation on friday). possibly cooking very very tasty stuff in order to use supplies before rome.
and, yes!. just 2 more days until rome.
…
*adds 2 and 2*
shoot. and i had the fantastic luck to hurt myself to the point where walking is NOT fun. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
well, i hope i’ll get better soon!
—
quote of the week, from early morning (tuesday) advertising:
“and remember everyone, there is nothing more powerful than the statement the woman makes with her hair!”
– toni pony creator.
amsterdam sunday, part 2, plus other days
date: 1095871914
mood: tired, headachy (was happy)
listening to:faithless – i want more (GET THE VIDEO, YOU, YES YOU!)
sunday
woke up at 10. brushed teeth, brushed hair, washed contacts. quickly packed bag, made sure i forgot nothing, and left to the reception.
now the reception is really cool. the breakfast was scrambled eggs, 2 pieces of bread, one white one brown, some jam, and butter/salt/pepper on the tables. and free tea. coffee cost 50 cents. but i dont drink coffee. and you all know how much i ADORE scrambled eggs! matter of fact i had some this morning (wednesday :D)
anyway… we get there, get free breakfast, and head out (dead tired from not enough sleep) to van gogh.
we arrived to van gogh around 12, spent 4 hours there… walked out DEAD tired.
the museum was nice, huge, a lot of paintings, a lot of information. i enjoyed it, but i liked orsay (paris), much MUCH MUCH more. however they had an exhibit of manet, in addition to van gogh, so it was fairly nice as well.
after that, we were starving. thomas and fabio decided to eat in the first place they found, i refused to eat in that overpriced tiny crappy (pardon) box, and asked to find someplace better.
we didn’t REALLY suceed. went to burger king, after about 10 minutes of walking. food is expensive, and it fed me, so i guess it was fine. you have to pay for ketchup while you’re there!
after burger king, went downstairs, watched people do weird things (like, a guy doing weird stuff with a soccer ball, i’ll post pics when the server is back up), some guys dancing (breakdancing), magicians, that sort of thing. jerome and simon had a capuccino (i didn’t), and after about 30 minutes of basking in the sun, we moved on to the next point of our trip.
the way home.
the sun was setting, it was 5 pm, and we were all DEAD tired. like, falling off our feet. so we shuffled towards the car (we reparked it after leaving the hostel), sat down, and basically (i) fell asleep for the rest of the way.
monday/tuesday
i had no classes in the morning. just chinese in the evening. anyway, my last blog describes it well.
so where does that put us?
ah, tuesday evening. after french (it was fun, but i’m running out of steam to type anything up), took bus home. 40 frigging minutes. 2.40 euros. grrr.
well, came home. ate. felt dead tired. did nothing for an hour or so.
people were going to go out, sooo i decided why the heck not.
it was SO worth it.
we went to highlander (meh, full), twee harem (meh, even MORE full – we just stood outside), then de alla, which was AWESOME. i DANCED! like, pair dancing! with twirls, and moves and stuffs. and just regular dancing. and i felt good, and it felt like i was doing it right! after de alla we moved to metamorphosis (its just another club next to maarkt), and danced more there (mostly dance music that i like, with a little bit of modern dance/hip hop), it was fantastic.
we came home at 4 am. went to sleep at 4:30.
now here is the fun part.
woke up at 9 (ouch, 2nd day of 5 hour sleep). read my psych textbook for today’s class. walked to class, coming like 4 minutes late (10 or more is a miss! again, ouch). had cool 2 hour class.
found out that i have tomorrow off :D YAY SLEEP
friday i get paper info for psych and philosophy.
and if i understand correctly, i will not have any classes in philosophy/psych next week, and no classes in psych the week after that as well.
anyway… i spent 6 hours here. not just typing this entry, talking to people, trying to relax. i’m hungry and not relaxed at all, but i wanna go home, i’m starving. people here ate pizza. my stomach is dead.
all in all… last 2 days flew by, the weekend flew by, today crawled by. i’m tired, so no emails (sowwie). i will do tomorrow, as i can be home :D and no chores to do!
i hope this was good enough. i barely have the energy to finish this sente