trying to keep track of my life
date: 1078856388
mood: thoughtful
listening to:lovers in a dangerous time [radio, no idea who sings this]
i had a horrible headache all day yesteday.
its better now.
i’m good. great, even. just weird. =)
doing assignments when headache not killing. 240, and such.
date: 1075673504
mood: studious
listening to:patricia kaas – mon mec a moi
sarah came over this weekend. robert me and her went out for coffee, after a brief photoshoot (2 hours) of sarah by me. there’s some neat stuff, i might post.
the picture of the month of january is:
i’m doing reading.
date: 1073628314
mood:
listening to:
1 bottle and im buzzed.
met hesi in pub, we talked, it was nice although too loud for talking at times. therefore the smirnoff.
at 6:15 i realized i have a 6-9 class today.
my dog doesn’t have a hot spot, she has histiocytoma – http://www.vetinfo.com/dhistio.html
blah. vet said not to worry so far.
my classes are fun. i like all of them. no more math! even if they are hard and info overloading at least they are fun.
date: 1072119300
mood: christmasness
listening to:pink – god is a dj
christmas would be so much more fun if you could find perfect gifts for people without stressing out about it and spending a shitload of money you don’t have!
date: 1120023838
mood: i want another 8 hours in the day just for sleep
listening to:
M T W R F 9 10 NMC329H 11 NMC329H 12 HPS306H HPS306H 13 PHL285H PHL285H 14 PHL285H PHL285H 15 SLA314H 16 FAH290H SLA314H 17 FAH290H 18 RLG375H PSY370H 19 RLG375H PSY370H 20 PSY370H 21
i can’t wait till the weekend is here. i want a clean room and energy.
no linguistics tomorrow. yay!
RLG375H1 F Buddhist Thought L5101 Tuesday 6-8 26Lectures
An introduction to philosophical thought in the Buddhist traditions of India and Tibet.
reallyreallyREALLY want but apparently requires permission if i’m missing 3 RLG courses – which of course i am. damn. calling tomorrow
PSY370H1 F Thinking & Reasoning L5101 P R6-9 J. Vervaeke
definitely taking – prof awesome and required for degree
NMC329H1 F Dead Sea Scrolls L0101 F10-12
An examination of the political context in which these scrolls were produced and preserved.; different theories of who produced
these texts, e.g., Sadduccees, Zadokite Priests or Essenes; the way the scrolls use earlier biblical traditions. No
Hebrew/Aramaic required; students with background in these languages will have opportunities to use them.
Possibly to brush up on hebrew, and sounds cool
SLA314H1 F Dostoevsky L0101 R3-5
Got really good rating. 90%+ retake, excellent prof, and, well, interesting.
also neat but don’t make schedule as nice (i.e. 2 days off – mon and wed)
PHL285H1 F Aesthetics L0101 MW1:30-3 39L
An historical and systematic introduction to the main questions in the philosophy of art and beauty from Plato to the present.
These include the relation between art and beauty, the nature of aesthetic experience, definitions and theories of art, the
criteria of excellence in the arts, and the function of art criticism.
FAH290H1 F Asian Art L0101 P M4-6
Major themes of eastern art drawn from the rich legacy of Ancient Near Eastern, Islamic, Indian, Chinese and Japanese
civilizations from prehistory to the recent past. Emphasis on appreciation within cultural context; museum visits.
HIS295H1 F African History L5101 W6- 8
NEW303H1 F The Unconscious L0101 M4-7 A. Yeoman
Current discussions of the hypothesis, especially Jung’s collective unconscious; critical examination through retrospective
analysis of the evolution and development of the concept in works from philosophy, psychology, poetry, ethnology, science and
popular culture that anticipated, influenced or were influenced by the work of Freud and Jung, post-Freudians and post-
Jungians.
HPS306H1 F Technology & War L0101 TR12 B. Hall
An examination of the tools of war in the Western world from the Middle Ages to World War II, including not only weapons but
science and technology.
i still gotta get approval for RLG375. grrrr. its so awesome. i want. grrr.
date: 1115102010
mood: total rollercoaster of a day
listening to:sarah brightman – dust in the wind
date: 1108103874
mood: doubleplusgood
listening to:
date: 1104703525
mood: tired. handra.
listening to:pink floyd, comfortably numb
i’m stuck between two places. here, and there. sometimes i’m more here, and sometimes i’m more there, but the transition is painful. writing emails is difficult, it brings up happy memories that i am afraid i’ll not be able to replicate. when i was there, i felt like an adult … a young adult, if that suits you more. when i was there, i felt mature, independent. and here, i suddenly am trying to mesh into my old image, who i was before i left, and it is not who i am any more.
maybe that is why i am so tired and shying away from people. maybe that’s the reason for my headaches, for the sickness, for the handra.
i am just not sure how to speed up the process.
anyway.
new years came and went, and so did my birthday. i’m 21. an abstract number … representing nothing. i am happy; as everyone i have ups and downs, but majority and overwhelmingly i am happy, and could not ask for more from life. (i can of course still demand more from myself, heh).
my new years resolution is to hold promises, and to be on time. as such, expect me to make less promises.
i hope to spend more time with my dog, to raise my marks, to balance life, to be more healthy, to shoot more but less at the same time. i hope to be more creative, more smart, and i hope next year i’ll be able to look back as i am now, and say that this year i have learned more than i could have expected.
date: 1097588098
mood: sick.
listening to:
mirjam is moving today.
i had 4 hours of classes. i was chair of a very unproductive pbl discussion.
in the end after everything everything my prof mentioned this quote by nietzsche, and i immedeately thought how perfect it is for photography, as an artist.
But in the smallest and greatest happiness there is always one thing that makes it happiness: the power of forgetting, or, in more learned phrase, the capacity of feeling ‘unhistorically’ throughout its duration. One who cannot leave himself behind on the threshold of the moment and forget the past, who cannot stand on a single point, like a goddess of victory, without fear or giddiness, will never know what happiness is, and, worse still, will never do anything to make others happy.
-Nietzsche, from The Use and Abuse of History
anyway. i have 2 more hours of classes today. i had 2 trachitol to freeze my throat (and some mouth incidentally) from pain, one 400mg ibuprofen, and one can of red bull to make sure i’m on my feet.
i quickly googled trachitol, and asked my prof for some translation. here is the list of ingridients:
lidocaine hydrochloride-1-wate r / aluminiumkaliumsulfa at 12-water / propylparahydroxyben zoaat / pepermunt olie / sorbitol / magnesiumstearaat / paraffine, vloeibaar /
i only googled lidocaine, and its a numbing agent.
by the way:
ibuprofen (advil, hinthint): “Prolonged use can cause gastrointestinal problems, even liver failure. If you’re taking ibuprofen consistently, talk to your doctor. You can be monitored for problems. ”
okay. quick summary of the day so far and i’m off to home.
woke up at 6 (again) from thirst. drank warm water that i put on my bed stand from night before. went back to sleep. woke up at 9, with a killer headache (and other joys of being sick, like nausea, weakness). took the pink pill, made tea, studied, made sure to hit my head twice against stuff (honestly, i’m so freaking clumsy! i’m sick, so its not helping, but argh, bumping into stuff full speed when you have a headache is sooo unconductive to good mood, especially in the morning), borrowed francesca’s bike and ran to lecture after realizing ishouldn’t miss it as its important, and relevant to the discussion which i’m supposed to chair.
2 hours class, 30 min break – i review for my discussion, drink my red bull, then 1 hour discussion, with prof greately assisting me. now its done, i write this and i’m off to home, where i’m going to go with thomas who is driving mirjam to her new home on the other side of the river, and dropping me off next to my faculty (i hope). and then, the joys of joys, 2 more hours of classes (french), and then i wait 30 minutes for bus and come home.
*groan*
i want to get better. i want to sleep. but i really can’t miss any more work, and i can’t just do nothing, and i’m sick and tired of feeling so numb from the painkillers – at least i’m on my feet, but goddamnit, i want my body to obey me and stop being so weak, and sick, and ARGH.
it is very good that everyone are so understanding (while being slightly sceptic of the fac ti’m still sick, but i dont blame them), and are willing to help as muhc as they can.
if i don’t get better tomorrow… i will… i wil… …
i don’t know what i’ll do, but it’ll be something bad! like chips. mmm, chips.
